why are genuine good guys so rare

You’re out at a bar with your girlfriends, having a great time. You spot a guy across the room and he’s cute, so you decide to go talk to him. He seems really nice and you hit it off right away.

You exchange numbers and start texting each other all the time.

Things are going great until you find out he has a girlfriend. Or he’s only interested in hooking up. Or he’s just not that into you.

You’re left wondering, “What is wrong with me? Why can’t I find a good guy?”

It seems like everywhere you turn, you see happy couples holding hands, going on romantic dates, and generally enjoying each other’s company.

But when it comes to your own love life, things just don’t seem to be working out. You’ve gone on countless dates, but most of them have been with guys who just weren’t right for you.

And even when you find someone who seems promising, it always seems to end in heartbreak.

Why are good guys so rare?

It seems like they should be easy to find, but they’re actually not. There are a few reasons for this.

First of all, what does it even mean to be a “good guy?” This is different for everyone, but some common qualities include being kind, considerate, honest

You might be starting to wonder if there are any good guys left out there. But the truth is, there are plenty of good guys out there – you just have to know where to find them.

Here are a few places to meet quality men:

Volunteer for a cause you care about.

There’s nothing like meeting someone who shares your values and is passionate about making a difference in the world. When you volunteer for a cause you care about, you’ll meet like-minded men who are also looking to make a difference.

Join a club or group.

From book clubs to basketball leagues, there are all sorts of clubs and groups out there that you can join. This is a great way to meet guys who share your interests and hobbies.

Attend a networking event.

Networking events are a great place to meet successful, ambitious men who are looking to make connections. Even if you’re not looking for a job, it’s always good to have friends in high places!

Go to a bar or club.

Yes, you might meet some guys who are only interested in hooking up. But you might also meet some great guys who are looking for something more serious. It’s all about putting yourself out there and seeing what happens.

Online dating.

If you’re not having any luck meeting guys in person, why not try online dating? There are plenty of quality men on dating sites and apps who are looking for a serious relationship.

These are just a few ideas to get you started. Remember, the best way to find a good guy is to be one yourself. Be kind, considerate, and honest, and you’re sure to attract quality men.

Other questions I was going through for good guys to date:

How do you know if a guy is genuinely good?

Signs he might not be good for you:

  • He doesn’t listen when you talk
  • He’s always trying to start arguments with you
  • He’s constantly texting or looking at his phone when you’re together
  • He neglects your needs and only does what he wants to do
  • He doesn’t include you in his plans
  • He’s always talking about himself and never asks about you
  • He’s disrespectful to you or others
  • He doesn’t show any interest in your life or hobbies
  • He’s not supportive of your dreams and goals

If a guy is constantly doing things that make you question his character, it’s probably best to move on. There are plenty of good guys out there who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

What are some qualities that all good guys have in common?

Some common qualities of good guys include being kind, considerate, honest, and supportive. Good guys also know how to communicate and healthily resolve conflict.

They’re also usually patient and understanding. Lastly, good guys are typically looking for a serious, committed relationship.

What is the problem with nice guys?

People often say that nice guys finish last because they’re too afraid to take risks or make a move.

They might also come across as needy or clingy, which can turn women off. Additionally, nice guys might have a hard time setting boundaries and might be taken advantage of by people who take advantage of nice people. I think most women do not find this attractive

Lastly, nice guys might have a hard time being assertive and standing up for themselves, which can make them seem like pushovers. I do not find nice guys attractive myself as I do not respect them.

Why Good Guys Go Bad

The #1 reason why good guys go bad is they’ve been hurt in the past and are now guarded. In their attempts to please other women they have allowed themselves to be taken advantage of one too many times and have become jaded.

There is an outside chance they simply haven’t found the right woman yet and are still waiting for Ms. Perfect. They might also be going through a tough time in their life and taking it out on the women they date.

Whatever the reason, good guys who go bad eventually come to realize that being a jerk is not the way to get the girl (or keep her). If you’re dating a guy who’s starting to show his true colors, it’s best to move on before you get hurt.

How can I tell if a guy is a good guy or a player?

There are a few signs that can help you tell the difference between a good guy and a player.

A player will typically try to move things too fast, whereas a good guy will take things slow. A player is also more likely to be non-committal and might not introduce you to his friends or family.

A player is also more likely to disappear for days or weeks at a time without any explanation, whereas a good guy will usually keep in touch even when he’s busy. If you’re unsure about a guy, it’s best to err on the side of caution and move on.

These are just a few ideas to get you started. Remember, the best way to find a good guy is to be one yourself. Be kind, considerate, and honest, and you’re sure to attract quality men.


There are plenty of good guys out there, but you might have to weed through some bad ones first. Look for qualities like kindness, consideration, and honesty. Also, make sure he is interested in a committed relationship. If you’re ever unsure about a guy, it’s best to move on. Being a good person yourself is the best way to attract quality men.